Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Quotes

“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.” -Rilke

One Way Out

The burden of unknowing and doubt lays heavy on any human heart which has attempted to live in the world. A burden which for the most part is furthered by the Church rather than embraced.

Mind you, this burden is not a problem to be solved, but embraced. Too often the Church has used St. Thomas as a means of saying: do not doubt! But this is as far from truth as one can get.

Doubt and unknowing: there can only be one way out (if, in fact, we can ever truly escape) and that is to go through them. Just as with the wrath of God, so with doubt.

Run towards the doubts and uncertainties, sprint even. For at the center there lies the cross, the greatest example of uncertainty. Doubt is part of existence, faith. Faith without doubt is boring, and a creation entirely planned is equally dull.

But:
“And your doubt can become a good quality if you train it. It must become knowing, it must become criticism. Ask it, whenever it wants to spoil something for you, why something is ugly, demand proofs from it, test it, and you will find it perhaps bewildered and embarrased, perhaps also protesting. But don't give in, insist on arguments, and act in this way, attentive and persistent, every single time, and the day will come when, instead of being a destroyer, it will become one of your best workers--perhaps the most intelligent of all the ones that are building your life.” Rilke 

Sunday, July 28, 2013

On Christianity as Absurdity

"Modern man must descend the spiral of his own absurdity to the lowest point; only then can he look beyond it. It is obviously impossible to get around it, jump over it, or simply avoid it." Vaclev Havel

Much of what I believe has become absurd, or seemingly so. I've come up against the limits of reason where one can do nothing other than embrace the absurdity. Is that not faith itself? To embrace the utter strangeness of the gospel, its inherently radical nature.

And maybe that's why Christians are so obsessed with having a rational explanation because we have to defend ourselves against the attack of atheists. But is this not the absurdity of the gospel? That we don't defend the validity of our beliefs because they cannot, in fact, be defended. This is not to say they're invalid but rather that the so aptly called 'Christ-event' is absurd and as such cannot be explained.

But once more we encounter an absurdity. By realizing the absurd nature of reason and going onward in faith we embrace absurdity once more. Absurdity is given up for lack of power and replaced by an absurdity of power in weakness: the cross.



Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Anecdote(s)

1.
For a church culture that wishes biblical faithfulness over cultural norms our view of women is based upon culture and its stereotypes. 

2. 
Christianity is said to be based in the bible but is, in fact, most fully embodied by our lives.

3. 
Law and gospel, two tensions intertwined. 


Sunday, July 21, 2013

To Be Determined

1.
My lovely dances in the moonlight
always moving, an image of fluidity
and grace. She always dances to a
specific rhythm and beat. Nothing 
can stop her and her indomitable
spirit. Her dance is a fight, a cry, a
raging against the sadness and the
deadness of the world today. My
lovely dances in the moonlight.

2. 
Oh, oh, look in the mirror young
one. Oh,
tell me what you see. See a light
shining in your eyes as you try to
smile. Those glittering moments
when you can see past the evil,
past the dark,
are fleeting. There and gone and 
back again like a ghost that never
can or ever will quit.  

3.
Not sure what this all means or even
stands for. Not really sure I want to.
But I can't say I never will know. To
search and wonder and pray and breathe
and sleep, that is the fullness of life. To
feel the curve of your lovers body on yours
and the smell of their sweat is the fullness
of being.

4.

I sit, silently.

5.

God, the silence that speaks, through whom
and in whom and by whom we live, move,
and have our being. 

Thursday, July 18, 2013

On Heresy


  Heresy is a good thing. I know the church proper should be opposed to heresy but I honestly cannot find good reason to stand against it as it is. By this I mean, simply, that heresy, is over rated. It is a word thrown around in the church today, especially by Protestants who want to sound like they have some grasp and/or appreciation for church tradition, and is so often used (and abused, frankly) that it is essentially meaningless. So, how is a word that is, for all intents and purposes, meaningless, a good thing?
  Heresy is simply any doctrine/dogma/idea contrary to orthodox Christianity. Leaving aside the issue of what orthodox Christianity is, it would seem rather wrong of me to suggest that heresy is a good thing in light of this basic definition. But I will suggest such a proposition. And my basis for this claim is simply that seeking Truth (whatever that may entail or be) requires one to step on toes. Truth is to be sought and in doing so one may find that they are enjoining themselves with a heretical notion. And the notion that this is a bad thing, to enjoin oneself with heresy, must be done away with. Inherent in the search for Truth is the risk of heresy. Heresy serves two purposes in the church: 1) to cause reevaluation of dearly held beliefs so as to test whether those things are True and 2) to spur the Church proper into action (I am grateful to Dr. Michael Bauman for this clarifying point). As such heresy is a good thing. It serves a long run purpose. However, does this mean one should arbitrarily become a heretic? No. But one must accept that inherent to Truth seeking is the risk of heresy and that holding a heretical notion (if, indeed it is heretical) can be a good thing for your beliefs and the vitality of the Church. 

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Untitled n. 4

Walk into the sunlight
watching the car

pulling into the driveway
across from you. Observe

and watch and learn
as the woman clambers

out. Breasts singing as
they go up and down

with each breath. Observe
and cross the line. In

the soul everything goes
a-flutter. Something is

happening, occurring
and stirring.

Vere Tu Es Deus Absconditus



  I am a Christian. I pray like crazy. And I grew up being told to listen in prayer. I've tried listening but nada. Exactly what is entailed in listening to/for God? The still, small voice? How does God speak? Through his word? Sure, but that's its own dilemma right there. So, I prayed and tried to listen and God was silent. What now? Silence, just silence.

 -"My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?"-

   I use apologetics to give reasons, primarily to myself now, for my faith. Yet, God escapes me. "Jonas, you need to have heart knowledge, too!" Well, how? Like stated above the silence is frightening and overwhelming. Apologetics is all well and good till it isn't.

 -"Pointless, because it seems to me like an attempt to put a grown-up man back into adolescence, i.e. to make him more dependent on things on which he is, in fact, no longer dependent, and thrusting him into problems that are, in fact, no longer problems to him."-

   I accept unknowing, the lack of certainty. Or, rather, I try to. I think hard and think well, attempting to use my mind to get somewhere with the unknowing and lack of certainty. But it's very obvious what I am doing. I'm finding certainty in the use of my mind to be uncertain. Oxymoron much?

 -"The eternal silence of these infinite spaces frightens me."-

 

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Untitled n. 3

See the sky, see the pavement
wet and moist. Pleasantries exchanged
between the rain and the dirt. So
my imagining goes. Smell the birds
and smell the sounds they make.
Fresh, aren't they? Biting in a good way.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Anecdotes

1.
God is fully revealed in Jesus Christ, implications of this?

2.
Jesus demands something more from us than religious observance.

3.
God self-limits himself.

4.
A relationship not a religion is too weak; rather, a life instead of a religion.




Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Jesus Is Not For America

That's right.

Nor is America for Jesus. In fact, much of America is antithetical to Jesus. Or, more frankly, Jesus stands opposed to much of America (at least as it is).

Jesus stands and says love your enemies; America goes to war regularly and has since Vietnam (basically, we've been in a war for thirty plus years straight).

Jesus says turn the other cheek; America seeks its own interests and spits at anyone who gets in the way.

Jesus says he is the Light; America, via the mouth of George Bush, claims to be the light and hope of nations.

Don't get me wrong, America has some wonderful parts and facets. But as that shocking and odd band we all love states, "We've baptized the Empire into the Church and hailed it sanctification." The American Church has become pathetic. We've gone to bed with the State. Am I saying don't be patriotic? No, but consider your nationalism and hold it in check.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Quotes

"Generally speaking, women aren't very promiscuous. Males, by contrast, are extraordinarily slutty. And if that's the case, then why are women rather than men called sluts?

A psychological study in this regard. A group of researchers had attractive assistants approach men and women of the opposite sex on a college campus. After a few minutes of chit chat the assistant would sexually proposition the student. The question was, what percent of women would agree to have sex with an attractive man after a few minutes of conversation? And what percent of men would agree to have sex with an attractive woman after a few minutes of conversation?

Seventy-five percent of the males agreed to have sex. The women?

Zero percent.

Generally speaking, women are choosy and discriminating when it comes to sex. Men not so much. 

In short, from an empirical standpoint men are the whores.

And if that's the case, why are women always cast as whores, even in the bible, as the sexually insatiable ones?

It is a product of Freudian projection. Throughout history, religiously conservative males have had to confront one of the greatest sources of their moral failure: the male libido. The male libido--the fact that men are sluts--is a sore spot of any male community wanting to pursue purity and holiness. And what has happened, by and large, is that rather than admit that males struggle mightily in the sexual realm, males have externalized the blame and projected their libido onto women. Rather than blaming themselves for sexual sin males have, throughout history, blamed women for being temptresses. The Whore was created to be the scapegoat to preserve male self-righteousness. Rather than turning inward, in personal and collective repentance, men could blame women, blame the whores, for their sexual and moral failures. It's not our fault, the men say, it's the whore's fault.

Examples of this sort of projection are too numerous to list. Christian campuses and youth group talks are full of this sort of stuff.

But let me bring this back to whores and brides in Revelation. Given the problematic nature of this metaphor, how are we to approach these images in the bible? 

I'll tell you what I do. For me, I don't read the Whore as a woman. I read it as the Freudian projection it is. The Whore is the male libido projected onto women.

More simply, when I see the Whore in Revelation I don't see a woman.

I see a man."

Richard Beck 

Friday, July 5, 2013

John Donne Poem

Part of a poem about Jesus.

By miracles exceeding power of man, 
He faith in some, envy in some begat,  
For, what weak spirits admire, ambitious hate :  
In both affections many to Him ran.  
But O ! the worst are most, they will and can,  
Alas ! and do, unto th' Immaculate,  
Whose creature Fate is, now prescribe a fate,  
Measuring self-life's infinity to span,  
Nay to an inch.   Lo ! where condemned He  
Bears His own cross, with pain, yet by and by  
When it bears him, He must bear more and die.  
Now Thou art lifted up, draw me to Thee,  
And at Thy death giving such liberal dole,  
Moist with one drop of Thy blood my dry soul. 

Thursday, July 4, 2013

God Bless America and Other Grumpy Anecdotes

#1

The Fourth of July, more than anything else, is simply a holiday for the religion of America. Americanism is its own religion and the Fourth of July is its Christmas.

#2

Just having faith is a wonderful sentiment but, honestly, means nothing.

#3

All this is my self-aware attempt to seem intelligent.

#4

The Church is not to go to bed with the State and have the love child we see embodied in America today.

#5

As far as I'm concerned the reaction people have to gay marriage is reflective of their true heart; they can say they love gays but when they take bible passages to dehumanize them, their words mean nothing.

#6

Jesus as the center, not religion.

#7

"I discovered later, and I’m still discovering right up to this moment, that it is only by
living completely in this world that one learns to have faith. One must completely abandon any
attempt to make something of oneself, whether it be a saint, or a converted sinner, or a
churchman (a so-called priestly type!) a righteous man or an unrighteous one, a sick man or a
healthy one. By this-worldliness I mean living unreservedly in life’s duties, problems, successes
and failures, experiences and perplexities." Dietrich Bonhoeffer

#8

Belief in a God is, in some sense, a crutch.


Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Quotes

"“That which we cannot speak of is the one thing about whom and to whom we must never stop speaking.” 
― Peter Rollins

Untitled n. 2

Flick the lighter and watch as the sparks give rise to flame. The flame moves fluidly, from blue to yellow, left to right, back and forth, always in motion. Feel the warmth on the hand. Feel it as it moves from warmth to pain. Then let go and the flame dies a sudden death. Put thumb to the metal roller and feel the skin sear and seemingly melt, only to be left with a tingling feeling, one of pain and humor. Flick the lighter again again again.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Why I Need Fiction

I love non-fiction. I love theology, philosophy, all of it makes me deeply happy. Especially if it's grumpy or snarky. But I need a hiatus from the world of so-called reality from time to time. Actually, a lot of the time. Many of my peers seem to be obsessed with the abstract world of ideas. Ideas are wonderful but fiction, in many ways, grounds those ideas.
   Non-fiction is not bad. I'm not saying that. What I am saying, however, is that too much in one realm - theology and/or philosophy specifically - (especially for a Christian) can be harmful. And, no, it's not because they just need to get back to the bible. After a while we are able to deal with these ideas in a sequential manner and logically explain dogmas and doctrine but where is the joy? How do we ground ourselves and give feet to our ideas? More importantly, how do I, as a Christian, learn?
   The last question, it seems to me, is the one which needs answering. When I grew up I was told what was right, what was wrong and how to properly live, yes. But I learned from experience, from stories. Whether those stories were bible stories or just stories from Aesops or some other text, I learned little tidbits of wisdom and how to live. There is a reason the bible is a story and not a systematic theology. Everywhere stories form our identities. Which stories form us? Why do they form us? Are we, in a sense, the children of an ongoing tapestry of stories, an interweaving of ideas and identities?
   As such, it seems that, while important, non-fiction theological works seem to be more geared to our growth in knowledge but rarely, it seems, as full people living in a world of delights and pain. Am I saying fiction is better? In some ways, yes. Simply by virtue of the fact that it actually has characters living in some reality, living out some ethical system, and actually just being. Because, truly, in some mystical mumbo jumbo way, the characters of fiction do, in fact, exist. They exist for us as people who we admire, someone to hold on to, someone who actually instills in us some sort of emotion. Last time I checked no theological text ever brought me to tears, anyone for that matter. If it did let me know and we'll pray for you. But, no. Fiction does something for us, it stays with us. I can't remember certain doctrinal trivialities but I can remember, clearly, scenes from novels that stuck out to me and were transformative in my thought process.
   None of this, though, is hard and fast. If you love theology: wonderful. But consider reading fiction to ground your ideas and to interact with ideas in a very real sense. Logic is wonderful but it rarely impacts the way a story can. The bible is theological but it is a story, it is very much about reality and deals in the real, material, and sometimes immaterial, world. As Peter Leithart puts it in his book Against Christianity, (paraphrased), "Theology is a Victorian enterprise...have you ever read a theological work that mentions menstruation, disembowelment, castration?"  The point is this: theological works are all well and good but often separated from the story of the bible, a story grounded in the real world with real world problems.

   Thoughts? Complaints?

Reading

Notes from the Tilt-A-Whirl by N.D. Wilson
The Thanatos Syndrome by Walker Percy

Both glorious.

Monday, July 1, 2013

Gay and Beautiful and a Little Thing Called Love

I really do love the Supreme Court sometimes. Sometimes they make decisions which make sense; also, they're really good at instigating conversation. And with the overturning of parts of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) it's started a revitalization of the marriage debate. It has also managed to bring out the Christians in full force. "Oh no! America is going to hell! Go back to God!" are the cries of our wonderful Christians. But guess what? It's doing nothing. Nothing whatsoever. 
  
      I understand. But seriously? Running to Leviticus 19? If you're a Christian and you use Leviticus as your go to reason for why gays shouldn't be allowed to marry your hermeneutic is rather pathetic. Picking a verse, at random, from the Old Testament Law will not do. Be consistent. If you take this verse, which is not only moral but explicitly civil in nature (who else is going to enforce the death penalty for gays?), you need to take more. Oh, but you say: "There are different types of Laws in the Old Testament." Of course there are. But not in the sense you mean (moral, civil, and those relating to the sacrificial system). There is no clear indication that the Bible, in the OT or NT, ever delineates such a distinction. So unless you're a theonomist, which most Christians are not, don't run to the OT Law. But what about Romans 1? and 1 Corinthians 6? Both of these have a context and neither of these tell us what the government can or cannot do. 
   
     But the  fundamental problem is how we as Christians respond. As Rachel Held Evans so aptly states, "But it reminded me of one important, reality-based fact: Most people begin to recognize their sexual orientation when they are just kids, when they are young and vulnerable like this little girl. So when we, in the Church, discuss homosexuality as though it were an issue faced by “other people” who are “out there,” when we resort to stereotypes and language about hell and judgment and damnation, we may be doing serious damage to the most precious and vulnerable among us. Even our casual conversations with one another can be picked up by little ears and internalized in destructive ways." And her point stands validly. Go to almost any gay person and ask them when they realized they were gay you will get an answer that varies from young child to teen years. Either way one takes it words have consequences. Am I saying that if you have a conviction that being gay or gay action is wrong that's fine and wonderful. Consider, though, how you go about sharing this belief. Will you damn gays and call them abominations simply to be faithful to the Biblical witness? Or will you love them and say it a manner that admits you're just as much a worthless sinner as they? Because, frankly, all it sounds like from my side of the pew is a bunch of pissed off white Christians who think America is going to hell. They seem to be more concerned with America than with people and loving them. That pesky ol' second greatest commandment, right? 
    
     So, seriously. Get off your high horse. Get into the streets. Pray. Love. Interact. The Incarnation of Jesus demands that we as Christians live as part of this world, that the bodies we have are clean, that the Creation is healing and groaning to be fully restored, and that we must live separately. And stop focusing on that last point without the others. Because when you do, when you "hope all things" in people they have opportunity and you can grow and learn. 

People, Please...

Stating that America was founded on Christ is absurd. If America is founded on Christ then why are we not glorifying, nationally, a man who died a salvific death that was also political death? Maybe because, shocker here, we were never a Christian nation. Sure, we stole from Christian morality but that does not make us a Christian nation. At best it only makes us a moral one. And even that is an exaggeration. Do I love America? Sure, but don't tell me that you fight to get us back to the good ol' days of us as a Christian nation. Never existed. It truly is like finding Neverland.